Thursday, October 7, 2010

A little pamper Bre time...

Got my hair cut. Just got some layers but I really like it! I was looking at myself in the mirror and got sad. Even with losing 30 lbs I am still a huge fat ass. I barely fit in the chair... which I would not have 6 weeks ago. I wish losing 30 lbs would have meant I wasnt so huge anymore but it doesnt. Kinda knocked me back into reality. Its no wonder I haven't had a boyfriend since highschool and no one wants to go on a 2nd date with me. I am scared I will be alone forever. I just want to have a family of my own. It seems less likely every year. It hurts my heart.

4 comments:

  1. Oh Bre, I'm so sorry you're feeling so down. I can totally relate to how you feel. I've lost over 40 lbs, but I'm still freaking huge. Still have about 90 lbs to lose. UGH!!! I feel like the mountain I have to climb to get out of this fat suit is never going to be over. The truth is, you and I have both made huge strides toward our goals. We have both deceided enough is enough. You're learning so much about yourself right now. You're growing into not only a beautiful woman on the outside, but on the inside as well. The right man will come along at the right time. Rest assured. I have ZERO doubt you'll get your wish and have a family. Right now focus and you. I'm so proud of all you've accomplished in just 6 short weeks.♥ Chin up, friend. We're all here to cheer you on and see you to your goal. Plus you'll be moving back here soon and I can kick your ass if I have to. ;)

    ReplyDelete
  2. I got my hair reshaped last week. When I looked in the mirror, all I saw was fat and old. I tell ya, those salon mirrors lie, they lie I say! Like a big dirty rug. I think it's a conspiracy to sell you outrageously priced beauty products.

    You're on your way to becoming the person that you know is in there. I can't wait to see the final product. :-)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Thank you ladies! I was just feeling so horrible about myself last night. I had to realize that 30lbs ain't nothin' compared with what I still gotta lose. I just hope when I get to 60 I won't feel so bad still. I wanna sit in that airplane and not be uncomfortable or not have to stretch the seatbelt all the way out! I wanna feel pretty on the outside too! Damnit!

    ReplyDelete